Life balance is possible
Balance is not something that’s been a destination for me; it’s more of a journey. But there are some things that I do consistently and they really help me find that place that I call balance in my life.
You may think – gasp – I couldn’t possibly do those things. I’d be selfish to even think I could.
Truthfully, I’ve never felt selfish for taking these steps. And in that rear-view mirror vision we call hindsight, I know in my heart of hearts that doing these things allows me to step out for others in ways I couldn’t possibly have if I hadn’t said yes to me first. I know that to fill another’s cup, my pitcher must first be full. It’s in doing these things that I have the energy, drive, and desire to be there for other people. By taking care of me first, I have more to give. It sounds counter intuitive, and yet it’s the truth. It’s the thought behind my show close of, “Do good things for you today.”
3 Easy steps to find the life balance you seek
1. Remember how important you are. You are the most important person in your life. If you’re not, you need to change that shit immediately. It’s important to understand this. You don’t need to sacrifice your comfort, safety, values, or any other damn thing to “make someone else happy.” They’re responsible for their own outcomes. And you for yours.
2. Learn to say no. No is a whole and complete sentence. You do not need to justify, explain, validate, or negotiate this position. Look at it this way: you’re not saying no to other people, you’re learning to say yes to yourself. Hell, practice saying to to everyone and everything. You can always say yes later if you want to. Build this muscle. I had to do this in the beginning and yes, it was uncomfortable. It got easier. Especially, when I found more time in my world and less resentment for doing things I never wanted to do in the first place.
3. Communicate your needs appropriately. Do not expect others to guess what you want. They can’t read your mind. Do not beat around the bush; in fact, assuming or just hoping they will come to understand what it is you need, will only leave you and them frustrated and unsatisfied. Ask for what you need. Just remember they should be the most important person in their life and no is a whole and complete sentence for them too.